Many women spend great amounts of energy looking for their Mr. or Mrs. Right as if on a reconnaissance mission, while the person that is really missing in action is themselves.
As a eager young married woman in my early twenties, I thought I needed to be everything my husband wanted. While not possessing a strong sense of my own identity, I strived to become a cookie cutter, Mrs. Perfect.
Although I was married to an incredibly wonderful man, the issue of identity wasn’t something my husband could give to me. After Bill lost his battle with cancer, I began to reconnect and accept the wild-hearted woman I had abandoned along the carbon copy road.
The seven years of being a widow and single mom, gave me the opportunity to face myself head on. Like Dorothy on her trek to Emerald City to see the OZ, no one could give to me what was already resident within myself. I had to find my own way home to my authentic self.
It was during this season that I became reacquainted with the woman I set aside, while serving an illusion of who I believed I was “supposed” to be. Now when I coach women who have surrendered their authentic voice, we begin in the most obvious place, at home.
It was when I possessed my own inner strength that I met my husband Mark and remarried. And there has been no stronger supporter in encouraging me to live from my true voice and moxie.
Real men want women to speak and live from their authenticity. When a man is secure within himself, he doesn’t need, or want a parrot. He will be attracted to the wild-hearted girl resident within you, not a girl whose fire has been doused by duty and performance. Secure men want a partner who has something to bring to the relationship, not a house keeper lacking vision.
If you want to attract your mate, don’t try to be everything you think someone wants. Be the authentic person that you truly are. If you’re waiting for someone to make you come alive, you are MIA and have abdicated your true self.
Uncover your true heart beat and honor it. The journey for your authentic self begins at home, so why not make it a glorious celebration! How will you give yourself permission to live from your untamed heart?