Mama Gave Me Art But I Chose Joy

smallercharcoal copy

Today I was thinking about the joy overflowing in my heart that has come on the heals of a particularly hard year with the loss of my mom and other things. As I was skipping along in my thoughts I actually saw myself rise up as if I had wings. There has been a ton of gold composted out of some pretty shitty rough patches this year.

This morning when a young woman texted me asking me how she could overcome her heartbreak, I thought to myself, about the hard leaning in I'd done this past year and other years too. How I gave myself utter permission to feel my pain and not stow it, but also intentional processed my emotions to deliberately focus on  joy daily.

That hasn't always been as easy as it might seem particularly when my hormones crashed and my adrenals hit bottom. Every afternoon like clockwork I would experience a huge dip as the bottom fell out and I wondered how in the heck I had been so cheery earlier in the day. I soon started a natural protocol to begin the work of rebuilding my adrenals and routing out my depression, but I also positively counteracted my melancholy with militant gratefulness and proactive joy. 

Some people might think I am merely a Pollyanna. Truth be told I am, but I have been in the trenches long enough to know that I can choose to nurse despair or whatever reality I'd rather have. 

I have found that when you are determined to look on the bright side of things you are pretty sure to bump into them. No, that doesn't mean that everything always turns out rosy, but it does mean that joy and happiness are not circumstantial, but an inside job. I know that reality to be true. When I choose to find joy amidst difficulty it always amazes me how quickly I get a platter  full served up.

For instance, before Christmas I had a sinus infection that kept me down for over two weeks. My sweet husband put on one sappy Hallmark Christmas special after another to help me feel better. One silly selection in particular had me crying in my medicinal tea! As if a search light had been turned on suddenly I recognized some resentment I had been toting and due to the plot of the movie my heart immediately became softened and I was supremely grateful for the individual I had previously resented.

The tears quickly turned into laughter when I realized how ridiculous the who scenario was. Now if thats not funny, I don't know what is? God can use anything and any circumstance to rearrange our perspective, emotions and joy level. We just have to participate with the opportunity when it comes along and better yet create it through a willing, grateful heart. Who wouldn't choose joy over resentment, criticism and anxiety any day? The ticket it to be intentional about practicing it. It is a muscle that needs regular exercise and thankfully there is always something to be grateful for and joyful about.

You may be wondering what in the heck this has to do with today's painting? Art has to do with seeing and perspective. My life is a creative canvas that can't be compartmentalized. The reality of who I am all comes out in my work and in my play. I am a spiritual, intuitive human being and that is the only way I know how to roll, being. :)

Check out day 4 of the all the artist participating in 30 Paintings In 30 Days